Below are the 9 most recent journal entries recorded in thisnamerocks' LiveJournal:

Tuesday, March 1st, 2005
10:51 pm	it gets before its all over I have so much running through my head right now. i dont even know what is going on. I am sitting here thinking and being emotional.... fuck emotions.... they make you do thinkgs you dont want to do... or you do want to but you know deep down inside that it would be a super bad idea if you did whatever it was that you were going to. I am costing... i wish i could drive... but im costing and i dont know how to fix it. it is liberating to say no... i know i have said it before.. but it took annother look form the outside to realise the need for change... I have to do something about this. i dont know what exactly i am going to do, but it cant be drastic, that never works out. it has to be a suprise attack. if i slowly creep up the attack will never be detected! i have made my plan. it doesnt help the pieces on the floor.... im already broken. gosh.... i keep telling myself that i am just passing the time... but we all can see past my sily little discise... i thought today was wednesday... it was a big blow to the knee when i found out that it was tuesday! im sooo ready! come-on college. is it bad that my back is numb? I hope for the best as i plunge back into my costing... ill get back to you about taking the driver seat. ill know ill get through this some how Current Mood: i have to pee (Comment on this)
Tuesday, February 15th, 2005
12:26 am	LoVe Well it is Valentines Day. In the spirit of V Day this is going to be about L-O-V-E! I don’t know why I thought it would be a good idea to watch the notebook tonight. Well I think that it is completely unfair for movies (such as the notebook) to advertise a false love. If there is such a thing called love it certainly fucks people up (not cures dementia) I think that it is completely unfair for people to sell impressionable girls (that would be me) this false idea of love. "Dusk, i realised then, is just an illusion, because the sun is either above the horizon or below it. and it means that day and night are linked in a way few things are; there cannot be one without the other, and yet they cannot exist at the same time. how would that feel, i remeber wondering, to be always together, forever apart." -Nickolas Sparks Current Mood: awake (Comment on this)
Tuesday, February 8th, 2005
5:50 pm	is it because i have breasts, exquisit breasts? This is the end of the Dynasty. i am soooo sick of it. My life is being wasted away. There are people out there getting arrested for stealing flags and wiping their butts with them. Im sitting at home typing and filling out scholarships and aplications. WILL IT EVER END? I am giving up being boring for lent. as well as bread.... yuck for being fat Current Mood: crazy (Comment on this)
Sunday, January 23rd, 2005
11:08 pm	Just so you know i feel a WHOLE lot better! Today was sooo wonderful! My mom decided that she couldnt wait untill tomorrow so we had to celebrate today! (she is soo funny) I thought that was great, but walking into my kitchen and a one legged pirate stripper with nipple rings is in my kitchen. (dont worry it was a cake) I love my girlfriends! poop for school.. do i really have to go? Current Mood: cheerful (Comment on this)
Thursday, January 20th, 2005
10:22 pm	neck pains and forgotten friendships Well im finally back online! I feel like i am in forth grade again.... I hope he is really that important! H-bomb has the flu(gross) now im starting to cough and get all sick... Blah i feel like poop I wish i had written an entry when i was in a better mood.... guess what? im not anymore Current Mood: sick (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, June 24th, 2004
3:00 am	XxSuPeRflyAdRixX: i feel like im going to throw up CoconutSnowcone: why? XxSuPeRflyAdRixX: dunno CoconutSnowcone: here's the bottom line CoconutSnowcone: it will be okay CoconutSnowcone: maybe not right now CoconutSnowcone: maybe not tomorrow CoconutSnowcone: but eventually...everything will turn out okay thank god for best friends and phone convorsations (2 Comments |Comment on this)
12:37 am	Parents who bring squalling brats to R-rated movies Circle I Limbo Osama bin Laden Circle II Whirling in a Dark & Stormy Wind Saddam Hussein Circle III Mud, Rain, Cold, Hail & Snow Bill Clinton Circle IV Rolling Weights assholes Circle V Stuck in Mud, Mangled River Styx George Bush Circle VI Buried for Eternity River Phlegyas Militant Vegans Circle VII Burning Sands people who cut in line Circle IIX Immersed in Excrement the crazy teacher in donnie darko Circle IX Frozen in Ice Design your own hell (Comment on this)
12:20 am	i know that you ment it well today was quite the day..... it was the funeral today, wich means no stops on the way to sob-vill. it was sad and oh so final. i would talk more about it and annlize it and over anailze it but i think that it is just what it is. A time and a place to say our final goodbyes. i have daecided to get rid of all the hate in my life... ALL OF IT. it will be a rough task, but what the hay. i also thought about tring to get the drama club host and put on a sadihokins dance.... FUN RIGHT! i will do anything to not think anout my current life i am a huge planner and not A big exicuter of the plans (which is a bad thing) im going to buy a black book and write everything down in it... first thing will be a peronal note to chage the problem stated above. have you ever had something really shitty happen and just want to go and cry into one person's arms more than anything..... it sucks when they arent there to confort you. Current Mood: lonely (Comment on this)
Monday, June 21st, 2004
10:45 am	Well today has been quite the week.... this is my new journal..... i am the ex SuperFlyAdri. so i hope that you enjoy.. i switched journals becase i looked back and realised how stupid i used to be and so now i am starting anew.. and i will most likely look upon this and will reaise that i have failed misrably. my great grandfather passed away on saturday. he ment so much to me and even more to my mother. it was hard, but he was ready. i just wanted him to be happy and confortable. he wasnt, so now that he has passed this world and moved onto the next he will be happy and confortable. its just so easy to be selfish and keep him alive just becuase i needed him to be here. When the nuse came in and talked to us about houspice we all cried and freaked out and my mother said something that i will never forget as long as i live... i love my grandfather enough to let him go... those were some of the hardest words ever to leave her lips. but i realised that i felt the same way. if he wated to stay alive he would have kept fighting but he was ready, it was just his family pushing him to stay here that kept him. After that convorsation i knew that i didnt not want to be there when any nuse needs to talk to someone in the family. so the next time she came in with more bad news i stayed with my papa and i held his hand tight. they left the room and it was just him and i. i crwled up next to him and layed my head down on his sholder. i loved him so much and emotion swept over me.... i love him so much. i told him that i loved him and that i was here for him and all he had stength to do was to squeese my hand. i know he loves me too. i know he loved me too or i dont know how to put it. i said my last good bye. it was the strangest thing, saying goodbye for the last time. i didnt know for sure it was actually going to be the last time i got to see him, but i just had this awful feeling. i have never had that feeling in my whole life... but i knew, im never going to hold my papa's hand ever again. i am never going to run into his closet and choose a pice of candy from his brandy glass, im never going to sit next to him at christmas time or thanksgiving. he is gone. he is and will be ever so missed by me, his entire family, and all of the many many people whose life he touched with his genorosity. i love you and will miss you so much... i hope to see you again... somehow someway. i miss all of you in Keller... ill be home sooner than you would think i got to see all of my old friends here (usually just see a few) and i realied soething about this place..... EVERYONE SMOKES... everyone im not even kidding. its like hey adrienne what are you doing... wanna go smoke. I JUST WANT TO MAKE THIS CLEAR TO EVERYONE I DONT SMOKE NOR DO I PLAN ON MAKING AN EXCPTION FOR THINK ONE TIME! I DONT CARE IF YOUR NOT GOING TO TELL ANYONE. Thank you DARE! well its true you can never go back to what you had before... Current Mood: awake (Comment on this)